Sectarian Religious Violence in American Cities -- Always at Low Prices

Please write Wal-Mart CEO Lee Scott a little Christmas note to say that you don't think it's a good idea for Wal-Mart to be selling the video game "Left Behind: Eternal Forces" to our kids.

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "You do know that heathen fortune-telling devices like me will be first against the wall when the Tribulation Force marches into town, don't you?"\\

The Things People Send Me, I Swear....

http://www.ajg41.clara.co.uk/mirrors/index.html

Do You Want The Terrorists to Win?

Your 'Do You Want the Terrorists to Win' Score: 100%

You are a terrorist-loving, Bush-bashing, "blame America first"-crowd traitor. You are in league with evil-doers who hate our freedoms. By all counts you are a liberal, and as such cleary desire the terrorists to succeed and impose their harsh theocratic restrictions on us all. You are fit to be hung for treason! Luckily George Bush is tapping your internet connection and is now aware of your thought-crime. Have a nice day.... in Guantanamo!

Do You Want the Terrorists to Win?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "My results are more reliable."\\

Two Rats Left

Bob died the other day. Ratzilla died a couple of weeks ago, and I could have sworn I wrote a post about him, but I don't find one on my blog. Now only Chewbacca and Horatio are left in the cage on the living room coffee table.

I had to ask Kathe for those names. I couldn't remember them, although at least I recognize them and can now remember which is Chewie and which Horatio. That's embarrassing, but really none of us love these rats the way we did previous generations of rats.

We didn't seek them out -- they were dumped on us by Kathe's son Justin when he broke up with his girlfriend and soon after stopped speaking to us (we still don't know what that's about, becuase he won't tell us) -- and we've been busy a lot of the time, but really I don't know why we never seemed to enjoy the company of these rats the way we did with others in the past.

Maybe it's the same thing that seems to have permanently drained our ability to plan and prepare more than the most basic meals. Dunno.

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "You will know when you care enough to go find out."\\

Things People E-Mail to Me

An art car festival:


http://www.artcarfest.com/vehicles/index.html

The Rapture Index:

http://www.raptureready.com/rap2.html


What an ant colony's nest looks like:

http://www.bioone.org/perlserv/?request=display-figures&name=i1536-2442-4-21-1-f01

John Baez's Crackpot Index

Jake sent this to me:

A simple method for rating potentially revolutionary
contributions to physics:

1. A -5 point starting credit.

2. 1 point for every statement that is widely agreed on to be false.

3. 2 points for every statement that is clearly vacuous.

4. 3 points for every statement that is logically inconsistent.

5. 5 points for each such statement that is adhered to despite
careful correction.

6. 5 points for using a thought experiment that contradicts the
results of a widely accepted real experiment.

7. 5 points for each word in all capital letters (except for those
with defective keyboards).

8. 5 points for each mention of "Einstien", "Hawkins" or "Feynmann".

9. 10 points for each claim that quantum mechanics is fundamentally
misguided (without good evidence).

10. 10 points for pointing out that you have gone to school, as if
this were evidence of sanity.

11. 10 points for beginning the description of your theory by saying
how long you have been working on it.

12. 10 points for mailing your theory to someone you don't know
personally and asking them not to tell anyone else about it, for
fear that your ideas will be stolen.

13. 10 points for offering prize money to anyone who proves and/or
finds any flaws in your theory.

14. 10 points for each new term you invent and use without properly
defining it.

15. 10 points for each statement along the lines of "I'm not good at
math, but my theory is conceptually right, so all I need is for
someone to express it in terms of equations".

16. 10 points for arguing that a current well-established theory is
"only a theory", as if this were somehow a point against it.

17. 10 points for arguing that while a current well-established theory
predicts phenomena correctly, it doesn't explain "why" they occur,
or fails to provide a "mechanism".

18. 10 points for each favorable comparison of yourself to Einstein,
or claim that special or general relativity are fundamentally
misguided (without good evidence).

19. 10 points for claiming that your work is on the cutting edge of a
"paradigm shift".

20. 20 points for emailing me and complaining about the crackpot
index. (E.g., saying that it "suppresses original thinkers" or
saying that I misspelled "Einstein" in item 8.)

21. 20 points for suggesting that you deserve a Nobel prize.

22. 20 points for each favorable comparison of yourself to Newton or
claim that classical mechanics is fundamentally misguided (without
good evidence).

23. 20 points for every use of science fiction works or myths as if
they were fact.

24. 20 points for defending yourself by bringing up (real or imagined)
ridicule accorded to your past theories.

25. 20 points for naming something after yourself. (E.g., talking
about the "The Evans Field Equation" when your name happens to be
Evans.)

26. 20 points for talking about how great your theory is, but never
actually explaining it.

27. 20 points for each use of the phrase "hidebound reactionary".

28. 20 points for each use of the phrase "self-appointed defender of
the orthodoxy".

29. 30 points for suggesting that a famous figure secretly disbelieved
in a theory which he or she publicly supported. (E.g., that
Feynman was a closet opponent of special relativity, as deduced by
reading between the lines in his freshman physics textbooks.)

30. 30 points for suggesting that Einstein, in his later years, was
groping his way towards the ideas you now advocate.

31. 30 points for claiming that your theories were developed by an
extraterrestrial civilization (without good evidence).

32. 30 points for allusions to a delay in your work while you spent
time in an asylum, or references to the psychiatrist who tried to
talk you out of your theory.

33. 40 points for comparing those who argue against your ideas to
Nazis, stormtroopers, or brownshirts.

34. 40 points for claiming that the "scientific establishment" is
engaged in a "conspiracy" to prevent your work from gaining its
well-deserved fame, or suchlike.

35. 40 points for comparing yourself to Galileo, suggesting that a
modern-day Inquisition is hard at work on your case, and so on.

36. 40 points for claiming that when your theory is finally
appreciated, present-day science will be seen for the sham it
truly is. (30 more points for fantasizing about show trials in
which scientists who mocked your theories will be forced to recant.)

37. 50 points for claiming you have a revolutionary theory but giving
no concrete testable predictions.

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Sorry, answer suppressed by the scientific establishment."\\

A Worse Appointment Than Rumsfeld's

Given the Bush Administration's track record when it comes to appointing people to office, what kind of person would you expect Bush to put in charge of Federal family planning programs?

A) Someone who hasn't worked in family planning since before the birth control pill was introduced.

B) Someone who has never worked in family planning.

C) Someone who is actively hostile to birth control, espouses weird crackpot notions about reproductive health and says that distributing birth control supplies (what he's now in charge of) is "demaning to women".

You guessed it, Eric Keroak is a "C" student! Now we can look forward to his doing a heckuva job on the nation's genitalia.

Or we could try to prevent his taking the job.

You never know. After all, that election thing seems to have helped some.

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Please, I'm not that kind of ball."\\

Kathe's Other Eye

Kathe sent me this:

So, this morning I had the second eye operated on. 1.5 hours prepping for operation, .5 hours recovering, 5 minutes actual duration of operation. I'd been told I could get a video of the operation but I forgot to bring a video tape, so I looked it up on youtube. Here's the link -- no, wait a minute, none of you actually want to watch, right? One commenter said "I'm gonna have my eyes hacked out by diseased parrots, so I'll never have to do this." But believe me, it's preferable to having the operation performed by sick birds. For one thing, they'd probably take longer.

So anyway, here's how it's done: The bad old lens is rendered into bits by ultrasound (the machine goes grungitta, grungitta) and then the bits are vaccuumed out. Then the new lens is put into the empty place thus generated. I have the impression that the lens orients itself over a couple of hours (ie, the surgeon doesn't have to). Eye is patched for six hours, and a couple more if double vision is present after six. Drops are put into the eye on an increasingly complicated schedule for -- um, weeks anyway -- or "until they're gone." Oh btw, the incision is described as "self-sealing" and today the surgeon actually said "The incision is sealing itself just fine."

During the operation, the eye to be operated on is paralized and entirely put to sleep, can't close lid, can't see anything. The other eye is under a drape. The body, as a whole, is so "relaxed" that movement is not possible, or at any rate, would be very difficult. The mouth is entirely able to ask questions. The "relaxing" substance is said to induce some amnesia, but I don't believe I have forgotten any part of it. I did forget that I had had the IV removed, when I was in the recovery room, but I think that's because my hand (where it had been inserted) felt pretty much the same after it was removed.

My previously operated eye is doing fine, vision improved at a decreasing rate for about the first week. Operated eye lets in a lot more light. I was dazzled at first, but I seem to be getting used to it. Oh, and speaking of dazzled, the glare from the *very* powerful dilation of the iris which lasts a couple of days, prevents one from really appreciating the improvement at first.

I hope you're all actually interested in all this. I have known several people who have had this surgery, but all they ever said was, "yes, I can see much better now."

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Seeing is believing."\\

I Know a Hero

Not very well, but I have taken my family to his restaurant a time or two.

Alem Gebrehiwot suspected Mulu Derbew was being viciously exploited by her employers, even when she doubted it could be so. He pursued the case and won her a visa to stay in the U.S.

Thank you, Alem. Thank you very much.

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Djegna."\\

Housing

I think every NBC station should carry Linda Ellerbee's special report "Building on Faith: Making Poverty Housing History".

Don't you think your local affiliate should run it also?

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "I wonder whatever became of my box?"\\

Robot Eyes

When the kids were little, we referred to prostheses as "robot" parts, as in, "he has no arm, so the doctor gave him a robot arm." They were greatly amused when I referred to Kathe's numerous gold crowns and gold-framed tooth as "robot teeth". Since then she has acquired artificial hips as well, and as of Tuesday morning we can add the lens of her right eye to the list (the old one had cataracts, and light-refracting wrinkles). When she's recovered, they'll do the other eye.

She's still seeing double, so the extent of the improvement isn't yet known, but already she's noticed the increased brightness of the image in her right eye. Stands to reason, since she's had the window washers in. Still, so far all appears to be well.

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "The eye is a window at the other end from the sole."\\

Darn Those Democrats!

Republicans kept warning us that voting for Democrats would lead to inflation, and sure enopugh, they were right.

Just look at how the price of gasoline has moved over the last three weeks, and how the momentum sudenly reversed the moment the election was over.

Darn Democrats....

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Sarcasm, like schadenfreude, should be indulged in with moderation."\\

Snowflakes

The Downtown Corvallis Association or whoever it is has replaced the light-up toy soldiers and wrapped gifts they used to hang from lampposts this time of year with big white snowflakes.

They're pretty enough, in a slick, sterile sort of way. Which is not always a bad thing: there is a place for sterile beauty in the world, just as there is for sterile people (some of the nicest people I know never had any children).

They remind me of the ads I used to see in the Wards catalog for a complete set of blue ornaments and blue lights to hang on your flocked artificial Christmas tree. Those were nice, too, in their own way, and I actually did admire them.

I just never wanted to have such a thing in my own living room.

I wonder what they did with the toy soldiers, though?

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "To know the fate of a superfluous soldier, ask Tommy Atkins."\\

What's My Accent?

What American accent do you have? Your Result: The Midland "You have a Midland accent" is just another way of saying "you don't have an accent." You probably are from the Midland (Pennsylvania, southern Ohio, southern Indiana, southern Illinois, and Missouri) but then for all we know you could be from Florida or Charleston or one of those big southern cities like Atlanta or Dallas. You have a good voice for TV and radio.
The Inland North
The Northeast
Philadelphia
Boston
The West
The South
North Central
What American accent do you have? Take More Quizzes

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Ye're oot o'yer minds!"\\

First Things First

Before anything else, we need to make sure that we've seen the last of electoral fraud of the Blackwell / Harris / Diebold school.

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Enough is bloody well enough".\\

Save Democracy, Make $250,000

An incentive for the Democrats, and one for the Republicans, what could be more fair?

Just provide evidence of electoral fraud.

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Will they provide witnesses with protection, too?"\\

The Return of the Unitarian Jihad

I can't imagine how this happened, but for some reason one Shannon, otherwise known as Sister Shotgun of Love and Mercy, posted a comment on my post from April of last year about the Unitarian Jihad.

Heh. I must remember to resume using my Jihadi name, "Brother Legging Chain of Patience".

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Just call me Ball of the Spikes of Wisdom."\\

Right to Vote

If you are a U.S. citizen, either naturalized or native, and have not been explicitly deprived of the right to vote as a consequence of a criminal conviction, you are entitled to vote on Tuesday.

Even if you have failed to register, you can demand a provisional ballot and register later.

You also have a right to demand proof that your vote has been counted.

If you have any difficulty in exercising your right to vote, call the Lawyer's Committee for Civil Rights Under Laws Election Protection Hotline at 1-866-OUR-VOTE (1-866-687-8683).

//;The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Inanimate objects aren't eligible to vote -- what's your excuse?"\\

Don't Use Improper Language

Here's a radical idea: What if the news media, when discussing medical matters, used normal medical terminology, rather than quack jargon invented by political hacks?

Maybe you'd like to suggest this idea to the media?

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Choose your words wisely, since you may have to eat them."\\

Nullius in Verba

1) The check is in the mail.

2) I love you.

3) I'm from the government, and I'm here to help you.

4) I'm from the Republican Party, and I'm here to improve the efficiency and effectiveness of your government.

//The Magic Eight-Ball says, "Nil desperandum."\\